I haven't posted here in almost two years now. Much of that time involved deep healing and consisted of a lot of work that I needed to do quietly and with trusted others. It was work I couldn't broadcast. Perhaps, one day, I'll be ready to tell that story. But now is not the time. … Continue reading The Lazy PhD: My slow, gentle approach to a life in science
Category: academia
How I approach a culture of competition in academia
I began my PhD program a little under four years ago terrified of and intimidated by the other PhD students in the lab and my program more broadly. It felt like I was questioning every moment why I deserved to be there with these people that were clearly smarter than I was. The pull to … Continue reading How I approach a culture of competition in academia
Sitting with the feeling of being in a mid-PhD slump
I started feeling a bit of a change this summer when it came to how I approached the work in my PhD program. I decided to use this space as an opportunity to share what my dialogue with myself around this looked like. I think this could apply to many different types of work, but … Continue reading Sitting with the feeling of being in a mid-PhD slump
Shifting from a deadline-driven mindset
Much of my success as a student was driven by a deep anxiety to complete assignments by their "due dates." I remember hanging a large desk calendar at the foot of my dorm room bed in college, so that the last thing I saw before I went to bed and the first thing I saw … Continue reading Shifting from a deadline-driven mindset
March
I was driving home from the lab a few weeks ago, when a simple, straightforward thought that seemed to bind what I felt were dissperate parts of me came to mind. I'll share it, and then I'll unpack what it means to me: "I look closely, and I try to understand." I've written about how … Continue reading March
February
It's been harder to come up with what it is I want to share this month. I've been settling in to a routine with my PhD program--one much more self-driven than before. I've shifted into the phase in which I'm not taking (many) classes, and instead I have to motivate myself to do the work … Continue reading February
reflecting on the past year: trying not to jump to resolutions
Like many others, I tend to want to start thinking about my New Year's resolutions around the end of December. I like using it as a time to reset and look forward. Sometimes, though, this means I fail to really think back on the past year--what worked, what didn't, what I'd change, and what I … Continue reading reflecting on the past year: trying not to jump to resolutions
september: what’s bringing me calm
(1) Learning how to read on my own, rather than for a class. I'm in the part of my PhD program where I've met my course requirements, and I need to start preparing for designing my dissertation study. What this translates to is reading more on my own, rather than reading with the external motivation … Continue reading september: what’s bringing me calm
august: what’s bringing me calm
(1) Being more aware of the "work addiction" mindset I easily slip into, especially with a new school year coming. My ADHD puts me at risk of addiction. My addictions haven't really manifested themselves as what I considered to be the well-known ones: drugs and alcohol. Instead, an addiction I trend towards--one that is pretty … Continue reading august: what’s bringing me calm
A kind of “back to school” post
"There's a line by the Italian writer Carlo Levi that I think is apt here: 'The future has an ancient heart.' I love it because it expresses with such grace and economy what is certainly true--that who we become is born of who we most primitively are; that we both know and cannot possibly know … Continue reading A kind of “back to school” post
The Lazy PhD 