I began my PhD program a little under four years ago terrified of and intimidated by the other PhD students in the lab and my program more broadly. It felt like I was questioning every moment why I deserved to be there with these people that were clearly smarter than I was. The pull to … Continue reading How I approach a culture of competition in academia
Tag: Anxiety
My regular habits and why they’re essential
At the risk of sounding prescriptive, I decided to make my first post of the year about the habits I've come to recognize as central to maintaining my well-being. I have loved reading this type of post from others, but I recognize that every habit someone else engages with may not work for every person. … Continue reading My regular habits and why they’re essential
Learning how to sustain the feeling of having changed for the better
I had thought I was going to write about something entirely different this month--how to not be militant and prescriptive when it comes to habits and routines. I may save that for a future post, but for now, I'm realizing that the more pertinent question for me--one that I keep coming back to is: "How … Continue reading Learning how to sustain the feeling of having changed for the better
Shifting from a deadline-driven mindset
Much of my success as a student was driven by a deep anxiety to complete assignments by their "due dates." I remember hanging a large desk calendar at the foot of my dorm room bed in college, so that the last thing I saw before I went to bed and the first thing I saw … Continue reading Shifting from a deadline-driven mindset
may: what’s bringing me calm
1. Starting an SSRI This will merit it's own post--as it's definitely been filled with ups and downs--but something that's been bringing me calm was starting a selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI) for my anxiety. While these are best known for treating depression, they can also be used to treat anxiety and obsessive compulsive disorder … Continue reading may: what’s bringing me calm
Part 3 of 3: Sources of Overwhelm—My Executive Functioning Disability
I started swimming lessons with the classic "water babies" classes taught at the local middle school. With the exception of long bouts of travel and pandemic restrictions, I don't think I've spent much time away from the pool since then. I'm the farthest thing from athletic, and swimming was no exception. I have the opposite … Continue reading Part 3 of 3: Sources of Overwhelm—My Executive Functioning Disability
february: what’s bringing me calm
1. Information as a coping mechanism for chaos This month turned out to be more anxiety-ridden than usual. A bit of this was to be expected with class demands ramping up, an exam, etc. But this was compounded for me by the winter freeze that knocked out much of the Texas power grid, which has … Continue reading february: what’s bringing me calm
The Lazy PhD 